| 21st March 2005 - 05:39:37 PM |
| 12821 : BLAKE PERRY |
| Hi dustin, my mom just went to see you at the funny bone in springfield illinois. she said you were halarious! She also got her picture taken with you. her and her 2 sisters. I'd like an autographed picture from you if you wouldnt mind. I am 10 and i really like watching you. |
| 21st March 2005 - 08:29:19 PM |
| 12822 : Gay Casey Casem |
| Screech, remember that episode where I hosted the dance-off at The Max? Remember when Lisa was your partner and she had a sprained ankle? Remember when she danced 'the sprang?' Remember when you and her won the contest? Remember when the contest was over and I donkey-punched you in the alley behind The Max? |
| 21st March 2005 - 08:33:40 PM |
| 12823 : Teacha |
| I'm the nigger teacher from Good Morning Miss Bliss. I used to sit on Screech's face and let farts directly into his mouth. Then he would lick lick lick my nigger ass. I miss the good old days. |
| 21st March 2005 - 09:30:41 PM |
| 12824 : |
| check out this sexy picture of the double dog: http://207.234.209.30/savegord.com/news5/SbtB_TheNewClass_S3.jpg What's with the black kid in the back? Why is that kid wearing lipstick? Did Screech make him put on lipstick to suck him off? |
| 21st March 2005 - 09:35:42 PM |
| 12825 : |
| screech, i read this article about you: http://www.sj-r.com/sections/ane/stories/50565.asp it says that you poke fun at slater's permed mullet and zack's sexual preferences in your 'comedy' act. why is it ok for you to do that but it isn't ok for your legion of gay fans to post queer fantasies about you in this guestbook? also, it seems as though you are stealing material from this guestbook to use in your act. if you insist on doing so, at least let a few of us give you arabian goggles first. |
| 21st March 2005 - 10:54:06 PM |
| 12826 : Hulkamaniac |
| What's Up Brothers?!! Check out my site at http://www.hulkhogan.tk Whatcha gonna do when hulkamnia runs wild on YOU?!!!! |
| 22nd March 2005 - 12:10:58 AM |
| 12827 : |
| i want to fart in your mouth |
| 22nd March 2005 - 02:40:53 AM |
| 12828 : John McJohnson |
| It has been nearly another week since I last sent a message from Dustin Diamond's colon requesting help. I will continue to send more messages as often as possible, although I fear that my time in here may become short lived, for I was attacked again the other day. Somebody slipped several M&Ms into Dustin's dumper with their thumb, and as I attempted to collect them, the large hairy 'something' from before (or another just like it) attacked me again and stole my M&Ms. I tried to get away but unfortunately, it sucker punched me violently in my lower gut, causing me to keel over and shit myself. The hairy creature then proceeded to eat out my ass, thoroughly licking my butt and anus clean, even going so far as to stick it's tongue up my colon and suck out any remaining fecal matter. At that point I passed out and do not know what happened next. However, I now have reason to believe that I may have been a victim of one of the fabled "rim goblins" that I have heard so much about. To answer a question brought on by another poster, I do not know who that one black penis belonged to, for there are many black penises which pop in and out of here very frequently, as well as several other penises of various colors. I have also realized that most, if not all, of the distant voices that I have heard here in Dustin's colon cavity are actually coming from the outside world. I came to this conclusion several days ago when I heard lots of loud drunken laughter and sleazy Spanish language coming from multiple sources around me, immediately followed by several dark, well tanned penises violently penetrating Dustin's anus. Judging by the amount of blood and torn anal tissue that swished around me as I bounced around Dustin's colon cavity during this very rough and violent ordeal, as well as taking into account the loud expletives that they hurled around during this time, I now have reason to believe that this was an actual rape that had occurred on Dustin Diamond's body. I should also add that after the violent ordeal, I saw another opportunity for freedom when I noticed Dustin's bloody anus hanging open like a well worn sock, but when I attempted to exit the gaping hole, I ran face first right into a fat blunt butt plug, forcing me back into Dustin's colon cavity again along with the swirls of blood and Hispanic semen, which smelled strongly of Taco Bell hot sauce, horribly burning my eyes and giving me a severe case of uncontrollable diarrhea which I am still recovering from. I can only hope and pray that I am rescued from this foul, smelly hellhole before I run into another hungry rim goblin again. Please send help. Sincerely, John McJohnson |
| 22nd March 2005 - 03:50:24 AM |
| 12829 : me |
| wow... all of a sudden this guestbook got really funny again! |
| 22nd March 2005 - 04:31:51 AM |
| 12830 : ann |
| This site is very extensive! Great work! Thanks |
| 22nd March 2005 - 07:36:28 AM |
| 12831 : Spamming cunt |
| My penis is very extensive! Gay work! Wanks |
| 22nd March 2005 - 08:20:41 AM |
| 12832 : Zack\'s dad |
| Screech, come sleep over at my house again. Remember when Zack had a sleepover last week and you got lost looking for the bathroom? Remember when you accidently walked into my room nad caught Mr. Belding and me making out? Remember when Mr. Belding yanked off his underwear and threw it in your face? Remember when you liked the skidmarks on his jockeys? Remember when Mr. Belding and I double teamed you? Remember when we were done with you and you wanted us to suck you off? Remember when we said no and threw you out in the rain? |
| 22nd March 2005 - 08:59:58 AM |
| 12833 : HARDCORE TEEN GIRLS HARDCORE TEEN GIRLS |
| ß HARDCORE TEEN GIRLS HARDCORE TEEN GIRLSė |
| 22nd March 2005 - 11:25:46 AM |
| 12834 : Dustin Diamond |
| Matt (12820): I wanna party with you and your gay frat buddies! I'd love to chug on a few of your 'brewskies' - and by 'brewski' I of course mean 'hot cock'!! I'm flaming gay!!! |
| 22nd March 2005 - 12:02:20 PM |
| 12835 : Mario Lopez |
| Eyy, Dusty! I was thinkin - remember the time I invited you onto the SBTB set alone late at night because I knew you had the hots for me? Remember how I presented you with my proud Hispanic flesh-saber and you started gobbling on it like there was no tomorrow? Remember how after that you started to do me in the ass, and I asked you to talk dirty, so you called me a 'filthy fucking immigrant spic' and then ejaculated on my mullet? Remember how I then took a shit in your mouth? Remember how, after that, you realised that the cameras were on? Remember how it turned out that I had somehow organised a live broadcast from the set to every TV channel in the world? Remember how I'd positioned the cameras so that my face couldn't be seen but yours was in full view? Remember how, the following morning, every news channel and newspaper across the globe carried news of our tryst along with a picture of your 'Oh' face, and you never showed your face in public again? Hehehee, I sure zinged you good that time, huh buddy?? |
| 22nd March 2005 - 01:44:48 PM |
| 12836 : lovethenut |
| If you're travelling through Elko County, NV and you're balls need drained real bad, email me. I specialize in blow and go. Nobody will know. cya |
| 22nd March 2005 - 02:36:24 PM |
| 12837 : jeb |
| Just found your site, WOW, very pleased I found this site. |
| 22nd March 2005 - 03:51:48 PM |
| 12838 : |
| dustin diamond uses his immense power and influence in order to lure young boys into his trailer and fuck them in the ass. then he licks the shit out of thier freshley fucked assholes and drinks the blood and piss out of there dicks |
| 22nd March 2005 - 06:11:45 PM |
| 12839 : algo |
| HI DE HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO campers :S |
| 22nd March 2005 - 09:27:44 PM |
| 12840 : Remember when... |
| 21st March 2005 - 09:41:08 AM 12815 : Remember when... Screech, remember when your asshole used to not hang open like a wizard's sleeve? 20th March 2005 - 09:31:56 PM 12811 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where Mr. Belding's brother Rod was a substitute teacher at Bayside? Remember how he dressed like a burnout with long blonde hair, which resembled singer Michael's Bolton's 'do of the early 90s? Remember how everyone though he was a really hip dude, way cooler than his straight-laced principal brother? Remember when Mr. Belding introduced Rod to the class? Remember when, being the retarded queer that you are, you said "Two Belding's in one building, one of whom is balding!" Remember when you also said you were shocked that Rod was Principal Belding's brother because he had much more hair? Remember when you then remarked that Principal Belding had a much bigger forehead than Rod? Remember how incensed Mr. Belding became? Remember when his face turned bright red and he walked out in a huff? Remember when class ended and you walked over to the locker room to get ready for gym class? Rememeber when you opened the door and Mr. Belding jumped out from behind the door? Remember when he said "I'm gonna get you, FAGGOT!!!" Remember when he slugged you in the gut with a field hockey stick, breaking two of your ribs, and knocking you down on the floor? Remember when Slater came running at you and kicking you in the head, knocking out your front teeth? Remember how he was dressed as his pet lizard, Artie, which he would frequently dress as because he derived great homosexual pleasure by dressing up as animals? Remember when Zack came crashing throught the door and you thought he was going to save you? Remember when instead of saving you, he kicked you in the head, dropped trow and pissed on your face? Remember when Mr. Belding yanked off your pants and said "you've been a bad boy. Now you're gonna pay!!!" Remember when he had unprotected buttsex with you while Slater unleashed an HIV+ pile of shit on your head? Remember when Rod walked in and said "Richard, cut it out! I want to get some!" Remember when Rod dropped trow and teabagged you while Zack continued washing away your tears with a golden shower? Remember when you contracted 'the clap' and AIDS from this unprovoked homosexual attack? The Beldings really got you good that time! Thumbs up to Rocco and Dner for their recent 'remember when' stories. 18th March 2005 - 04:20:38 PM 12787 : Dner Hey Dustin? Remember on E! True Hollywood Story: Saved by the Bell, how the interviewer made you cry like a stupid fucking jew when he mentioned the time you were raped during the filming of Saved by the Bell Hawaiian Style? Remember how he mentioned how you went into a Denny's bathroom? Remember how a man came out of the bathroom stall next to you and approched you? Remember how you felt "nervous" and "uneasy" when he stood behind you looking over your shoulder watching you piss out of your tiny cock? Remember how you said "excuse me?" to the man? Remember how you grabbed you by your greasy jew fro and smashed your face into the urinal? Remember how you fell on the floor crying like a bitch still pissing? Remember how you felt when you were covered in your own piss and blood? Remember how you felt when you saw that it was actually Dennis Haskins that had did this too you? Remember how he whistled for Mario Lopez to come out of the other stall? Remember how Dennis Haskins stepped on your face so Mario Lopez could jerk off his spicy latin cock to the sound of you screaming? Remember how he unloaded his cum in your bleeding head wound? Remember how Dennis yelled "my turn!" and pulled his pants down and jammed his unlubed cock in your ass? Remember how you bled as he pumped your ass with his massive principal cock? Remember how you screamed in pain and Mario Lopez kicked your teeth out and yelled "SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU STUPID JEW! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!" Remember how Mario then fucked your toothless bleeding mouth while Dennis was still getting it on with your now torn asshole? Remember how Dennis pulled your arms back really hard and it made you scream while he shot his load in your bleeding ass? Remember how he said "how's a little HIV juice for you Screech?" Remember how he pulled out and squated over you? Remember how Dennis then sprayed his shit all over you? Remember how Mario came in your mouth and you gagged on his cum and threw up on the floor? Remember how Mario rubbed your face in the vomit? Remember how he turned you over on your back and shat on your face? Remember how he rubbed the shit in your hair and face and kick you in the mouth again? Remember how Dennis said "I'm sorry, let me clean you off?" Remember how Dennis Haskins then pissed all over you and Mario did the same? Remember how they kept kicking you in the head until you passed and then hog tied you with your own clothes? Remember how they then threw you in a bathroom stall naked and covered in their HIV infected bodily fluids and left you there for dead? Remember how you came too and saw Mark-Paul Gosselaar standing there? Remember how relieved you felt that he came to your rescue? Remember the horror you felt when whipped out his cock and finished you off? Remember how he carved his initials into your queer hairless boy chest so that you'd always be reminded of who did this too you? Remember how Dennis and Mario came from behind him with polaroid camera? Remember how they then carved their names in your chest? Remember how the then took a bunch of pictures of you laying there so they could jerk off to them later on? Remember how the only clear thought you had was how violated you felt? Remember how the feeling of violation made you erect and turned on? Remember how the then saw your tiny erect penis and then kicked you straight in the junk for being a jewish homo? Man, they really grilled you for the details in that interview!! 16th March 2005 - 09:43:57 AM 12763 : ox clone screech, remember when you were a washed up child star who had played a nerd character on a Saturday morning high school sitcom? Remember when your character graduated from the high school, but you came back a year later to play the principal's retarded assistant? Remember you played the retarded assitant until the series ran out? Remember when several years later you tried to simultaneously become a standup commedian and a bass player in a band? Remember when you grew a goatee that was unevenly cut, and everyone thought it was part of your comedy act (but it really wasn't)? Remember when Max Goldberg created www.dustindiamond.com to poke fun at you and many of the people who were annoyed by you when you were on your sitcom years earlier posted gay stories about you? Remember when you sought to acquire possession of dustindiamond.com through binding arbitration? Remember when you lost the arbitration? You really got fucked that time!!!!!!! 16th March 2005 - 01:11:36 AM 12759 : Ox Screech, remember that episode from Good Morning Miss Bliss where you were first given the nickname 'Screech'? Remember how it all started in gym class one day where you were changing at the end of class? Remember when you really had to go to the bathroom, so you went to the bathroom stall and dropped a huge load of crap? Remember how this took several minutes, and by the time you had wiped and were done, you were the only one left in the locker room? Remember when somebody suddenly switched off the lights and you fumbled around in the dark? Remember when you heard footsteps and what sounded like a mop being pushed around on the floor? Remember when the lights came back on and you were startled to see Mr. Belding and Milo, the black janitor, right in front of you? Remember how relieved you were to see these guys? Remember how the relief quickly changed to terror when Milo struck you in the face with the end of the mop? Remember when you fell over and bled on the floor? Remember when Belding yanked off your shorts and Mikey, your Italian mullet-headed classmate, jumped out from behind a locker and you saw that he was naked? Remember when oil from his greasy Italian hair kept dripping all over the place? Remember when Mikey kicked you in the back and then gave you a thorough anal pounding? Remember when he pulled out and blew his wad in your curly afro? Remember when Belding and Milo did the same? Remember when you started screaming in pain and Mikey pulled out a cassette recorder and recorded your screams so he could jerk off to them later? Remember when he played it over the Intercom one day and everyone heard you screeching in pain from the unprotected buttsex? Remember when from that day forward, everyone started calling you 'Screech' and would tell you that you were a huge faggot? You really got screwed over that time! 15th March 2005 - 01:57:21 AM 12746 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where the air conditioning at Bayside broke and the school got really hot? Remember when you were sweating profusely and the huge pubic afro on your head started dripping sweat all over the place? Remember when you complained to Mr. Tuttle that you were too hot, and he told you to 'SHUT THE FUCK UP, FAGGOT!!!!!!!!!" Remember when you were very frightened by Mr. Tuttle's outburst and started crying like a little bitch? Remember when everyone in class started laughing at you and you sprinted out of the classroom with your boney little arms flailing every which way like a huge queer? Remember when you ran to Mr. Belding's office and he said he'd cool you down? Remember when he pointed at your shirt and asked "what's that?" Remember when you looked down and Belding hit you square in the jaw, knocking you out? Remember when you came too and discovered that you were completely naked, your hands and legs were duct taped, and Slater was buttslamming you against your will? Remember when Slater pulled out and unloaded his HIV+ sperm in your mouth? Remember when Belding asked if that helped cool you off and you started crying? Remember when Belding said "I'll give you something to cry about" as he and Slater picked you up and fired you into a port-a-potty by the football field? Remember when they managed to stuff your tiny body into the blue water below the toilet seat? Remember when Slater took a shit on you while Belding pissed on your 'fro? Remember when you were stuck in there with rancid feces and urine for 2 weeks, until the next home football game? That's what you get for bitching about being too hot! You sure had egg on your face that time! 09th March 2005 - 12:56:41 AM 12670 : Ox Screech, do you remember that episode where everyone in Mr. Tuttle's Social Studies class had to dress up in an ethnic costume? Remember how confused you were and you didn't know what to dress up as? Remember when you went into Mr. Belding's office to ask for his advice? Remember how embarassed he was when you opened the door to his office becasue he had just ripped a nasty fart. Remember when he told you he'd eaten burritoes for lunch and had been running to the bathroom every 10 minutes? Remember when you asked what you should dress as for Tuttle's social studies class? Remember when he suggested you go as an Indian? Remember when he suggested one of those slik shirts that Indians wear? Remember when you thanked him and got up to leave his office? Remember when he said "but Screech, you still need one of those dots for your forehead?" Remember how happy you were when he said he could give the dot? Remember how much less happy you were 3 minutes later when Mr. Belding threw you on the ground, gave you a sweaty pair of Arabian goggles, and his asshole left a dark 'shit dot' on your forehead? Remember when iy took a full three weeks for Belding's feces to finally fade from your head? Mr. Belding really got you good that time! 04th March 2005 - 08:48:01 PM 12615 : Mario Lopez Eyyy, Dusty! Remember the time you jizzed in my mexi-mullet whilst being fisted by Mark-Paul and having Dennis Haskins taking a nice meaty shit on your face? Remember how you went "ZOIKS!!! I'M GONNA CUMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!" and unleashed several liters of man-milk into my hair? Remember how Mark-Paul pulled his fist out of your ass and you sprayed diarrhea all over his face? Gay? Farts? AIDS? Fisting? Blowjobs? Erect penises? Manginas? I'm flaming gay? Arabian goggles? Anal sex? Hahaha, we sure got you good that time, buddy! 04th March 2005 - 01:54:57 AM 12605 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when Zack had a crush on the hot brunette nurse? Remember how nervous Zack got around her and how he really wanted to ask her out? Remember how Salter competed with Zack to get her? Remember when you were sent to the nurse's office because the herpes Zack's dad had given you had flared up? Remember when you walked into nurse's office and saw Zack and Slater pulling a train with the nurse? Remember how horny you were and when Zack asked if you want some 'train action' yourself? Remember when you eagerly replied 'yes?' Remember when you dropped trow and pulled out your tiny penis? Remember when everyone laughed because you were hung like a three-month-old? Remember when you walked over to Zack and Slater and startled when Mr. Belding jumped out from behind a curtain? Remember when you asked why he was there and he said he also wanted some 'train action?' Remember when you told him he'd have to wait his turn because the nurse only had 3 holes? Remember when Mr. Belding said 'who cares about her? You've got 2 tight holes and that's all that Mr. Tuttle and I need, bitbh!" Remember when Mr. Tuttle jumped out of the closet and broke a yardstick over your head, knocking you out? Remember when you struggled to breath as you came to and realized that Mr. Belding was teabagging you while Mr. Tuttle pounded you from behind? Remember when Mr. Tuttle transmitted HIV to you during this unprovoked homosexual attack? The Bayside gang really got you good that time! 01st March 2005 - 06:50:09 PM 12563 : Mario Lopez Eyyy, Dusty! Remember the time when filming on that one episode wrapped, and Dennis Haskins took you, me and Mark-Paul to that local bar to celebrate? Remember how you were like 15 years old and had never touched alcohol? Remember how Haskins bought you a shot of gutrot whiskey, which you downed and almost instantly became drunk off your ass, because you were an enormous pussy? Remember how it transpired that the club was actually a gay biker's club? Remember how you spent the rest of the evening being gang-raped up against the pinball machine, first by me, Mark-Paul and Dennis, and then by every hairy, STD-ridden, biker fag in the place? Remember how you stumbled out onto the parking lot at 4am with a gaping, dripping, bloody cornshoot and passed out? Remember how you spent a fortnight in hospital recovering from the effects of alcohol poisoning and all the virulent STDs the bikers gave you? Hahahahaha, we sure got you good that tie, buddy! Hooo-hooo-hoooo!!!!! 01st March 2005 - 08:19:03 AM 12553 : Mario Lopez Eyyy, Dusty! I was just thinkin - remember when filming of SBTB season 1 wrapped, and after the wrap party me and Mark-Paul took you down to Tijuana to get you laid? Remember how, when we got there, we force-fed you an entire bottle of tequila? Remember how you got insanely drunk and told us you loved us, and you got your cock out, and we laughed at you cos your cock was so small? Remember how we then said we were gonna take you to a brothel to lose your cherry, but instead took you to a nearby gay bar, and you didn't notice cos you were too out of it? Remember how we payed the ugliest, scummiest, most STD-ridden queer we could find to take you to his room and buttfuck you until the early hours of the morning? Remember the next morning you had no memory of the night before, but you said you thought the chick you laid was pretty hot? Remember asking us if it was normal to have a gaping, bloody, herpes-sore-ridden anus the morning after sleeping with a girl, and we said yes? Great times, mang, great times! 01st March 2005 - 12:28:56 AM 12544 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when you were taking playing baseball at Bayside during gym class? Remember how Mr. Belding was the substitute gym teacher that day? Remember when you were at bat and Slater was on deck? Remember when Mr. Belding was the pitcher? Remember when you stood in the batter's box and got ready to hit? Remember when Mr. Belding threw an inside fastball and drilled you in the nuts? Remember when you doubled over in pain? Remember when Mr. Belding ran over and asked if your ass was bleeding? Remember when you said "no, just my nuts?" Remember when Mr. Belding said "well, your ass is going to be bleeding soon?" Remember when you had no idea what he was taking about? Remember when Slater dropped trow, rolled over your mangled body and teabagged you as you cried out in obvious pain? Remember when Zack pissed on your hairless chest as Slater unleashed a brown torrent of diarrhea all over your head? Remember when Mr. Belding said "hey, hey, hey, what is going on here???" as he tore off your underoos and bounced you up and down on his cock as if it was a jack hammer? Remember when he pulled out and squirted his load in your eye? Remember when he and Slater enjoyed their bliss for about 15 seconds until they picked up your mangled body and fired it into a dumpster. Slater still wistfully reminisces about that episode? You really got screwed over? 26th February 2005 - 05:24:09 PM 12519 : Rocco I just watched a christmas episode of sbtb where the gang runs into a homeless family at the mall. Screech and Zack run into the vagrant in the malls bathroom where screech is trying to dry his wet pants. Wet, because Zack had pissed on him a few minutes earlier. The bum was scrubbing his armpits in the sink and had an obvious erection as soon as he saw Screech! To brighten up the mood Zack told the bum he was going to give him an early christmas present and ran out of the bathroom locking the door behind him. The bum quickly dropped trow and jumped on Screech beating him unmercifully! He first used Screech's fro like a sponge to clean his ass with then he began pounding his ass finishing off with a nice donkey punch redering screech unconsious. To top off the Xmax spirit he crapped on his head then unlocked the door and went on his way. The rest of the gang entered the bathroom and laughed and sang Xmax songs while screech lay on floor moaning and bleeding with a big smelly shit dripping off him! 25th February 2005 - 06:04:30 PM 12504 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where you, Slater, Zack, and Mr. Belding all watched "The Karate Kid" over at Mr. Tuttle's house after school one day? Remember how much you liked the movie because Daniel LaRusso, the star, was a nerdy kid like you? Remember how LaRusso got beat up all the time until he met Mr. Miyagi, a Japanese immigrant who taught him to defend himself with karate? Remember how he taught Daniel karate in unusal ways by making him paint his fence, wax his car, etc.? Remember how you wished you knew karate so that you'd be able to fight off all of the males bullies in your gym class who used to have unprotected buttsex with you (against your will) in the bathroom stall before class? Remember how after school a few days later you were walking home from Bayside when you bumped into a middle-aged Japanese man? Remember when you asked him if he knew karate, and he said that he did? Remember when you asked him if he would teach you the art, and he said he would if you did some chores for him? Remember when you said you understood and had seen all the unusual exercises Danny did in the movie and would do whatever he asked? Remember when he took you into an abandoned shed behind the local gas station, dropped trow, and told you to suck him off? Remember when he said that this exercise would teach you concentration, which is crucial in a fight? Remember when you continued to do this for the next two months until you finally realized that he was just a diseased Japanese bum who didn't even know karate? Remember when he gave you gonorrhea? You really got screwed over that time! 21st February 2005 - 10:48:53 PM 12443 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where you and the Bayside gang reported to the gym for flu shots? Remember how a couple of old nurses from a local clinic showed up to administer the shots? Remember when you got in line behind Zack and Slater? Remember when you got more and more scared as you waited your turn in line? Remember when you had a panic attack and started crying like a little bitch? Remember when Mr. Belding pulled you aside and took you into the gym teacher's office to catch your breath? Remember when you finally got your breathing under control and told Mr. Belding that you were ready for your flu shot? Remember when Mr. Belding said that the nurses had already left because they'd run out of shots? Remember how disappointed you became until Mr. Belding told you that he'd managed to save a shot for you? Remember when he asked if you were ready and you enthusiastically replied "yes!"??? Remember when Mr. Belding said "ok, here it is" as he stood up and dropped trow? Remember how confused you were, but Mr. Belding assured you that this was the proper way to dispense the vaccine? Remember how you stupidly believed him? Remember when he buttslammed you for the next 10 minutes while "administering the medicine" as he so eloquently put it? Remember when he finally finished and you limped back to class in obvious pain? Remember when you thought to yourself "man that was painful, but at least I'm vaccintated against the flu?" Remember how instead of getting the flu that winter, instead you contracted herpes from Mr. Belding? Remember when you found out that the herpres had cut short your life expectancy by about 15 years? Mr. Belding really got you good that time! 10th February 2005 - 12:22:58 AM 12296 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where Mr. Belding butt-slammed you for the first time? Remember how he did this against your will and repeated this every single day for your last two years at Bayside? Remember how after a while you learned to enjoy the anal pounding and grew quite fond of Mr. Belding? Remember how Mr. Belding was always the pitcher and he would make you suck him off also? Remember when you asked if you could do him an the butt with your hairless genitals, and he bluntly refused? Remember when he said he had hemmoroids that would painfully flair up if you pounded him? Remember how you naively believed his b.s. story? Remember when during your last sememster at Bayside you noticed that his ass smelled like baked tortillas while you tossed his salad? Remember when you didn't think anything of it until that time after school when you walked into his office and saw Slater giving Mr. Belding a thorough butt-slamming? Remember when you started crying and asked Mr. Belding how he could do this to you? Remember when Belding called you a "stupid faggot" and then threw you on the ground, teabagged you until he blew his load on your chest? Remember when that made you feel a little bit better until Slater took a smelly Mexican shit in your mouth? Belding and Slater really screwed you over that time! 06th January 2005 - 12:25:50 AM 11870 : Ox Screech, remember that one episode where Mr. Belding had unprotected buttsex with you for the 1,000th time and you told him you loved him? Remember when you asked if he was finally ready to be seen in public with you so that the whole world could see you two lovebirds? Remember when he told you he couldn't do that because he'd lose his job as a principal? Remember when you reluctantly told him you understood and asked him if you two could try something new? Rememner when he asked what you had in mind and you told him that you wanted to buttslam him for the first time ever? Remember when he said he couldn't do that because of his hemmoroids? Remember when he then gave you a thorough anal pounding? Remember when he pounded you so hard that you walked with a limp the rest of the week? Remember when you walked into his office the next Monday to give your ass to him only to discover Slater pounding away at Belding's ass? Remember when you ran out of the room crying? Remember the next day when you saw them kissing in public and finally realized that Belding had been lying to you for years and was merely using you for gay sex, and nothing else? Remember you ran over to Zack's house bawling? Remember when Zack wasn't home, but his dad let you in and then buttslammed you against your will? Mr. Belding and Zack's dad really screwed you over that time! 28th December 2004 - 12:40:16 AM 11778 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when you were acting in the school play? Remember when you had to tapdance in one of the scenes? Remember when Mr. Belding ran into you after school one day and asked why you were still at school? Remember when you told him that you were nervous about your tapdance routine and he told you he was an expert tapdancer back in his day and would give you a lesson? Remember when he asked you to come with him to his office for the lesson? Remember when he asked you to sit down in his chair while he put on his tapdance shoes? Remember how impressed you were when he tapdanced around his office for you? Remember when you asked him to teach you to tapdance like that? Remember when he told you to lay down naked on the floor for your lesson? Remember when you thought that his request was unusual, but complied anyway because he was your hero? Remember when he quickly duct taped your arms and legs to the floor before you could react? Remember when he said "here comes my next tapdance number, BITCH!!!" Remember when he started tapdancing on your hairless pre-pubescient beanbag for the next ten minutes until your sac was purple and swollen? Remember when Mr. Belding finally stopped and then walked out and said "see you later, FAGGOT!!!" Remember when Kelly walked by Mr. Belding office after he left and saw you taped to the floor? Remember when you thought that sweet Kelly would save you? Remember when you quickly realized that Kelly would not save you when she pulled down her pants and unloaded a huge Cleveland Steamer on your head? Mr. Belding and Kelly really screwed you over that time! 15th December 2004 - 01:20:15 AM 11662 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where Mr. Belding asked you if you liked "stomp"? Remember when you said "yes" because you thought he was referring to "Stomp," the modern dance troupe that uses everyday objects in non-traditional ways as a dance routine? Remember when you eagerly replied "yes"? Remember when you showed up at Bayside that Friday evening and Belding took you into his office? Remember when he turned off the lights and you stumbled about? Remember when he punched you in the stomache and you fell over? Remember when he turned back on the lights and started jumped on your head and stomping on your neck? Remember when he said "now do you like 'stomp,' BITCH????" Remember when Mr. Belding then lit your pre-pubescient hairless balls on fire with the lighter he used to light his bong when he would smoke up at the school? Remember when you cired out in pain and were relieved when James 'the actor' showed up at Belding's office door? Remember when you thought that the pain was finally over? Remember when you realized that your evening of terror was just beginning when James 'the actor' and Mr. Belding pulled a train with you, took turns teabagging you, took tag-team dumps on you, and then dropped you off in the ghetto to fend for yourself? Mr. Belding really screwed you over that time! 10th December 2004 - 09:32:20 AM 11618 : Ox Screech, remember when belding and slater used to beat you up after school and would humuliate you by making you drink their piss against your will? Remember how this went on for about four years, commencing on slater's first day, and ending after the graduation ceremony? Remember when you got the disease "gout" which is caused by piss drinking where uric acid forms crystals in the cartilage of your joints, which get painfully inflamed and swollen? Remember when you started having to walk with crutches every day for the rest of your life because of the pain? Belding and Slater really screwed you over that time! 08th December 2004 - 01:20:27 AM 11562 : Ox Screech, remember that episode from the New Class when Mr. Rogers from the College Years came to visit you at Bayside? Remember when he told you that Mr. Belding was his old frat buddy? Remember when Mr. Rogers walked into the gym and saw you and Mr. Belding? Remember when he ran toward you two and you thought he was going to give Mr. Belding a high-five? Remember when instead of giving Mr. Belding a high-five, he gave you a 'clothesline,' leveling you and knocking you to the floor? Remember when "Mr. Belding walked over and you thought he was going to help you up and scold Mr. Rogers? Remember when instead of helping you up, he gave you a 'leg drop' across your throat, one of his old wrestling moves? Remember when they both yanked off your clothes and pulled a train with you, with Mr. Rogers as the back and Mr. Belding as the front? Remember when they kept giving each other the secret fraternity handshake while they double-teamed you? Remember when they both pulled out at the same time and Mr. Rogers blew his load in your left eye while Mr. Belding blew his in your right eye? They got you good that time! 03rd December 2004 - 09:40:04 AM 11475 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where everyone forgot about your birthday? Remember when Mr. Belding saw you sitting down on the stairs in the hallway crying one day? Remember when he asked what was wrong and you said that you were upset that everyone forgot about your birthday? Remember when he told you to come to his office and he'd give you a present you'd remember for the rest of your life? Remember when you walked into his office and he slugged you in the gut and you fell over in pain? Remember when he dropped his pants, took off his underwear, and rubbing his herpes-encrusted dirty underwear in your face? Rememeber how for the past 15 years you've been trying to get rid of the herpes Belding gave you that day? Mr. Belding really got you good that time! 01st December 2004 - 11:33:30 PM 11454 : Ox [continuation of story from message 11423] Screech, remember how excited you were after practicing kissing on Mr. Belding's blow-up doll and how much you were looking forward to your date with Lisa? Remember when you were about to leave Mr. Belding's office to return to class when Mr. Belding said "Screech, there's just one more thing - I think you should know that girls have really stinky breath." Remember how you found that surprising because you had never noticed your mother with really bad breath, but you just shrugged it off because Mr. Belding was your idol? Remember when you showed up at the Bayside gymnasium on Friday evening for your date? Remember how ususual you thought it was that Lisa wanted you to meet her at the gym for your date? Remember when you walked into the gym and discovered that it was pitch black because all of the lights were off? Remember when you heard Lisa call out, "Screech, I'm over here honey?" Remember when you fumbled until the made your way toward here until she called out and told you to stop? Remember when she grabbed your hand and said she wanted to kiss you, but that she wanted you to walkfive feet to your left first? Remember when she told you to put your hands behind your back, often your mouth wide and stick out your tongue? Remember when you did and as you got close to here face you noticed that it smelled like ass? Remember when your tongue touched her lips and it felt really weird? Remember when it felt as though her mouth shit on you? Remember when the lights turned on and you discovered that Mr. Belding was standing facing away from you on a chair directly in front of you and you realized that you had just kissed his butthole and he had shit on you? Remember when you also saw Lisa, Jessie, Slater, and Mr. Tuttle and they were all busting up laughing at you? They really screwed you over that time! 01st December 2004 - 01:50:56 AM 11423 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when Lisa finally agree to go out with you? Remember how nervous you were because you had never kissed a girl before (or since)? Remember when you went into Mr. Belding's office and asked him for some kissing tips? Remember when he busted out a blowup doll and started kissing it on its lips? Remember when he handed the blowup doll to you and you started practicing kissing it? Remember how strange you thought it was that Mr. Belding had a blowup doll in his office, and you didn't know at the time what a blowup doll was used for? Remember when you noticed that the doll's mouth had a slightly slaty taste, but you didn't think anything of it? Remember how, unbeknownst to you, Mr. Belding had been masturbating in his office five minutes before you walked in and had blown his load on the doll's mouth? Remember when you were kissing the doll and Mr. Belding dropped his pants and started cracking one off until he blew his middle-aged load on your Zubaz pants? Remember when you didn't even notice this because you were concentrating so hard on learning a kissing technique? Remember when you walked out of Belding's office totally oblivous to the fact that his pants were down at any time while you were in his office? Remember when you got 'the crabs' in your mouth due to what you had been licking? Remember when you had to take oral medication for the next 6 months to get rid of Belding's little present? Mr. Belding really got you good that time! 29th November 2004 - 12:50:52 AM 11383 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when I needed help with my math class and Mr. Belding recommended that you tutor me? Remember when we agreed that I would pay you /hour for your tutoring services? Remember when instead of paying you in dollars, I paid you in unprotected buttsex, with me as the pitcher and you as the catcher, against your will? Remember when you complained to Mr. Belding, and he asked both of us to his office so he could mediate the dispute? Remember when you walked into his office after school the next day and were surprised to see Zack, Slater, and Mr. Tuttle in Belding's office instead of just Belding and me? Remember when you sat down and then Slater threw some encahalatas at you that he always had in his backpack? Remember when you asked him to stop and he responded by calling you a faggot? Remember how embarrassed you felt after the exchange? Remember how you felt even more embarassment when Mr. Tuttle dropped his pants and farted in the direction of the 'pubic forest' growing on your head? Remember when Belding walked into the office, locked the door, and dropped his pants? Remember when Slater, Zack, Mr. Tuttle, and I also dropped our pants? Remember when Belding told you that you'd better start sucking us off if you didn't want to get expelled? Remember when Belding and Tuttle pulled a train with you while Slater pissed on your back, Zack gave you a Cleveland Steamer, and I jerked off into your huge afro? Remember when Zack wiped his messy ass with your Zubaz pants, leaving a huge shit stain? Remember when this went on for about 30 minutes until Belding and Slater picked you up and dumped you in an alley behind the school? Remember when you went home crying and your mom bitched you out for staining your Zubaz pants? The Bayside gang really screwed you over that time! 15th November 2004 - 01:07:58 AM 11049 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where you were playing your robot, Kevin, at chess? Remember when you beat him a couple of times and Kevin got really pissed at you? Remember when you kept celebrating and made your robot leave because you told him you wanted to take a nap afterward? Remember when instead of taking a nap, you pulled out your Bayside yearbook and started masturbating while looking at pictures of Zack, Slater, and Mr. Belding? Remember when Kevin walked back into your room and caught you playing with yourself? Remember when Kevin became enraged and lunged at your neck with his metal claws? Remember when he pulled down his robot pants and cut off yours? Remember when he inserted his robotic metal penis into your buttholes? Remember he grabbed your abdomen roughly with his metal claws and started bouncing you up and down on his metal woodrow? Remember when you cried out in pain and he told to to "shut the fuck up, faggot!" Remember when he pulled out and said he was about to blow his oily load? Remember when he told you to open his mouth and then blew his oily robotic load on your tongue? Remember when you were relieved that Kevin was finally done with you? Remember when you quickly learned that he was not done with you when he started smacking you in the face with his metal claws and told you that because he was a robot, he could do you until his battery supplies ran out? Remember how disparaged you felt when he said that and you quickly realized that maybe you shouldn't have installed a metal penis on Kevin? Your robot really got you good that time! 11th November 2004 - 12:37:44 AM 10953 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when Slater invited you over to his place for his birthday party? Remember how excited you were when you received the invitation in the mail? Remember when Slater's invitation mentioned that there would be a pinata at his party? Remember when you went over to his party and asked where the pinata was? Remember when he said 'you're it, bitch!' as he punched you in the head? Remember when Slater tied you up and hung you upside down in his basement? Remember when Slater, Zack, Lisa, Mr. Belding, and me took turns hitting you with a stick? Remember when Slater pulled down your pants and you used his penis as a chair? Remember when he made you bounce up and down on it as though it were a pogo stick? Remember how you initially hated being buttslammed, but after a couple minutes you began to enjoy it? Remember when, years later you called this the turning point in your life because this was the moment when you realized that you were a flaming homosexual? Remember when Slater pulled out and you eagerly gobbled down his spicy load? Remember how you felt so blissful at that moment and you hugged Slater and enjoyed the moment? When when you quickly stopped enjoying the moment when Mr. Belding kicked you in the nuts, rolled you over and teabagged you? Remember when Zack pissed in your mouth as you struggled to breathe? That was Slater's best birthday party ever! 09th November 2004 - 01:10:44 AM 10910 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when Slater decided to help out his Mexican family members that worked in the Bayside cafeteria? Remember when you got in line and ordered tacos? Remember when you were hungry for a twinkie for dessert? Remember when Maxwell Nerdstrom sashayed in front of you, shaking his ass? Remember when you were fixated on his shubby buns and you pitched a tent? Remember when he grabbed the last Twinkie before you could get it? Remember when you started whining and crying like a little bitch? Remember when Slater called you a faggot and told you to "shut the fuck up?" Remember when Mr. Belding stormed out of the teachers' lounge and said "hey, hey, hey, what is going on here???" Remember when you told him there were no more twinkies, and Mr. Belding said "is that it? Come with me, I have a chocolate twinkie I can give you?" Remember when you followed him into the teachers' lounge and he locked the door behind you? Remember when he told you to close your eyes and he'd give you the chocolate twinkie? Remember how excted you were, because you'd never had a cocolate-flavored twinkie before, and you didn't even know that there was a cholocate flavor for twinkies? Remember how much you looked up to Mr. Belding and you viewed him as quite a father figure? Remember when you immediately stopped looking at him as a father figure when he leveled you with a sucker punch to your adam's apple? Remember when you hit the floor and were in incredible pain? Remember when Belding said "here comes the chocolate twinkie, faggot!" Remember when Mr. Belding dropped his pants and took an enormous shit in your mouth? Remember when Belding then stuck his erect penis in your mouth fucked the feces until he could take it no more, at which point he blew his load in the middle of the shit in your mouth??? Remember when Mr. Belding was done with you and he unlocked the door to the lounge and fired you back into the cafeteria? Remember when everyone started busting up laughing and you and your mess? Belding got you good that time! 04th November 2004 - 10:33:35 PM 10836 : Ox Screech, do you remember that episode where you were reading all of the books about UFOs after school and on most weekends because you were a big nerd with no friends? Remember when you heard that "Fire In The Sky," a 1993 movie about the alleged abduction of Travis Walton by aliens, was coming out on the upcoming weekend? Remember how you hoped that Slater, who the mere sight of would cause your ding-dong to harden, would ask you to see the movie and then let you suck him off afterwards? Remember when he actually did ask you if you wanted to see the movie with him? Remember how you blushed and pitched a tent as you quickly told him that would would? Remember how disappointed you were when Salter picked you up in his rusty Mexican pickup truck and you saw Zack and Mr. Belding sitting in the back? Remember how scared you were while you watched the scene in the movie where Travis Walton was abducted and brought up into the alien spaceship? Remember when you saw the aliens starting to perform invasive tests on Travis? Remember how cool you thought the movie was as you walked out of the theatre? Remember when you got into Slater's truck and immediately dozed off on the way home? Remember how you dreamed that you the one who had been abducted by aliens? Remember when you wished that aliens were giving you an anal probe at that very second? Remember when you opened your eyes and it came true? Remember when you looked around and saw that you were in an empty parking lot in the middle of nowhere and three aliens were groping you? Remember how all of the aliens had gray skin, large black oval-shaped eyes, and erect penises? Remember when the big fat alien anally penetrated you, giving you a good "probing?" Remember when another alien sat on you face and let loose a nasty fart that smelled like baked tortillas? Remember when the third alien coated the back of your head with a warm, yellow liquid that was coming out of its penis? Remember when this went on for about three hours until the aliens couldn't take it anymore? Remember how your anal area was dripping blood and alien jizz? Remember how scared you got when you thought that the big alien was about to remove its head? Remember how surprised you were when the big alien actually just pulled off a mask and you realized that the big alien had been Mr. Belding the whole time wearing an alein mask and gray tights? Remember when the other two aliens did the same and you discovered that they had been Slater and Zack the entire time? Remember when they got into Slater's pickup truck and drove off without you, leaving you to fend for yourself as blood and jizz gushed out of your unlubed butt? They really got you good that time! 01st November 2004 - 12:52:02 AM 10735 : Ox Screech, remember that episode from your senior year when Mr. Belding was about to get busted for posession of child pornography? Remember when Mr. Belding heard the cops pull up to the front door at BAyside? Remember how you were also in his office sucking him off while Slater was having unprotected buttsex with you when you heard the sirens? Remember when Mr. Belding started to panic because he knew why the cops were there? Remember when he asked you to take the blame and told you you'd probably only get a slap on the wrist? Remember when you were charged with possession of child pornography and the judge threw the book at you as part of a "get tough on porn" campaign? Remember how you had just turned 18 and were tried as an adult? Remember when you were sentenced to two years in the county jail? Remember when you showed up on your first day and several of the other inmates told you they'd be your friends? Remember how good that made you feel, and you quickly assumed that your time in jail would go quickly and you'd make some lifelong friends enjoying your experience? Remember when you quickly discovered that you would not make lifelong friends and would not enjoy your experience when you were subjected to daily gang-rapes? Remember when you got the 'clap' from your cellmate, Leroy? I hope to see the rerun of that episode again soon. It really provided a great 'Scared Straight' message. 24th October 2004 - 10:07:09 PM 10548 : Zack Morris Screech, remember that episode where a dork who went by the name "Prince Peussie" enrolled at Bayside? Remember how he always wore black gothic clothes and annoyed the hell out of everyone? Remember when he used to bitch about America and always complained about how school, his teachers, homework, etc. all sucked? Remember when Slater and Mr. Tuttle decided to teach him a lesson after school one day? Remember when Mr. Tuttle told Prince Peussie to stay after school to practice for a Driver's Ed class? Remember when Slater and Prince Peussie met in a classroom at 3:15 and got ready for the special after-school lesson? Remember when you walked into the classroom and Price Peussie said "hey Screech, what's up buddy? It sucks that I have to stay late today." Remember when you said "this class doesn't suck, but I'll give you something to suck on, faggot!" Remember when the Prince stood up and walked toward you like he was a tough guy? Remember when Mr. Belding walked into the room and said "hey, hey, hey! What is going on here?" Remember how Belding was holding a yardstick? Remember when you sat down, but the Prince was still standing and he started to complain to Belding that Screech was being mean to him? Remember when Belding smacked the Prince in the Adam's apple with the yardstick? Remember when the Prince fell down in pain? Remember when Mr. Belding kicked him in the stomach and stepped on the Prince's head? Remember when Slater got out of his chair and picked the Prince up and bodyslammed him? Remember when you pulled out your wang and gave the Prince a golden shower? Remember when Mr. Tuttle walked in carrying "The Club" for the Driver's Ed car, an anti-theft device? Remember when everyone thought that Mr. Tuttle was going to break up the fight? Remember when instead of breaking it up, Tuttle yanked down the Prince's pants and sodomized him with the Club? Remember when Mr. tuttle removed the Club and then had anal with the Prince? Remember when Tuttle finished and then you, Slater, and Mr. Belding each had your homosexual fun with the Prince? Remember when the Prince emerged from the beating and was so confused about his sexuality that he started dressing like a transvestite and called himself "Princess Peussie"? I don't know that the episode hasn't been rerun on TBS - it was my favorite. 24th October 2004 - 08:51:59 AM 10531 : A.C. Slater Hey Screech, you fucking pantywaste! Remember the episode where you, me and Ox were getting changed after football practice, when Ox said he had something to tell us? Remember how he came out to us, saying that beneath the macho jock exterior, he was in fact a flaming queermo of some considerable magnitude? Remember how he said he wanted his first time to be with us two, so you and I double-teamed him, me working the cock and you working the asshole? Remember the look of unsurpassed joy he had on his face while we were doing him? Remember how we got a mini-football from the sports locker, lubed it up and slowly inserted it all the way into his rectum? Remember how he gave anal birth to it? Remember how, after the shit-covered football popped out, a stream of runny liquid shit, containing blood, undigested vegetables and lumps of fecal matter, spewed from his gaping, ruined anus? We sure had fun eating that up! Yum yum!!! 24th October 2004 - 07:46:08 AM 10530 : A.C. Slater Hey Screech, you rancid horsefucker! Remember the episode where Zack walked into the men's bathroom, and heard strange sounds coming from one of the cubicles? Remember when he went to see what it was, and he discovered you and I having hot gay sex in the cubicle? Remember how the sight of us caused him to pitch a tent almost instantaneously, so you asked him to join in, something he did with relish? Remember when Ox came into the bathroom, heard us, and discovered us having a hot 3-way, so he dragged us out to Mr. Belding's office so we could be punished? Remember how Ox told Belding what he'd seen, and then left, and we expected Belding to expel us? Instead, he stood up, and we notcied that the tales of our actions had caused him to pitch an enormous tent? Remember how the 4 of us ripped our clothes of and got down to some of the hottest gay sex ever experienced in human history? That episode sure was a classic! 23rd October 2004 - 11:49:58 AM 10513 : A.C. Slater Hey Screech, you smelly queer. Remember the episode where we came out together as a gay couple? Remember how you started wearing make-up and we started walking around Bayside holding hands, occasionally kissing and fondling each other's crotches? Remember how pissed off Ox and the football team was to learn that there was a couple of fags in their school, so they decided to teach us a lesson? Remember how they caught us getting changed after gym and dragged us, stark naked, out in front of the whole school, who laughed incessantly? Remember how it turned out that some members of the team were closet queers, however, and the sight of our naked man-flesh stirred them up into a torrent of ecstacy, and they took us both back to the changing rooms and gave us the butt-fucking of a lifetime, followed by Cleaveland steamers all round? Boy, I sure enjoyed filming that one!! 23rd October 2004 - 11:38:20 AM 10511 : A.C. Slater Hey Screech, you fucking faggot. Remember the episode where, while we were getting changed together after gym, you caught a glimpse of my enormous manhood and couldn't help but stare open-mouthed at it for several seconds? Remember how I notcied you, and called you a fag, and you looked away and blushed, apologising profusely? Remember how I said I'd teach you to look at my dick, and I grabbed you by the afro and shoved your face into my crotch? Remember how, while you were gaping at my penis, it started going hard? Remember how I said I'd show you what we do to fags south of the border, and I prised your jaws open and slid my smelly, throbbing mexi-cock into your gullet? Remember how you choked at first, but then you sucked me off like a pro, and I blew a massive wad down your throat? Remember how you afterwards you said 'now its YOUR turn to be the bitch' and you bent me over and slid your long, thin cock between my muscular buttocks and started reaming like there was no tomorrow? Classic episode, that one! 22nd October 2004 - 01:42:35 AM 10482 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where you stayed after school to look after Becky, the duck you found in the marsh behind the football field? Remember when Mr. Belding ran into you after school and asked you you were still at school? Remember when you told him you were looking after Becky, and he called you a little queer? Remember when you started crying? Remember when Mr. Belding smacked you in the face? Remember when Slater walked into the room and you ran over to him hoping he'd protect you? Remember when you quickly realized he wouldn't protect you when he dropped his baggy acid-washed jeans and stuck his smelly cock in your mouth? Remember when Mr. Belding came around the other side and ripped off your pants and your underwear? Remember when Belding pounded away at your brown star while you blew Slater? Remember when Slater and Mr. Belding kept high-fiving each other while they pulled their train with you? Remember when Slater pulled out and blew his load in your huge afro? Remember when he shoved his skidmark-staine dunderwear right in your face? Remember when Belding donkey-punched you and you passed out? Remember when you regained consciousness and discovered that Belding was sitting in front of you and had blown his load in your 'fro? Remember when you felt someone else violating your chocolate starfish and realized it was me, Ox, the captain of the football team? Remember when I donkey punched you and you passed out? Remember when this routine repeated itself several more time with Zack, Mr. Tuttle, Max, and James the Actor all donkey punching you, and you losing consciousness each time? Remember how proud you felt afterward that you had been able to please so many of Bayside's queers? Remember how much less proud you felt 3 months later when you learned that you permanent brain damage from all of the donkey punches? The Bayside gang really got you that time! 20th October 2004 - 12:47:08 AM 10447 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where Mr. Belding took your class on an overnight whitewater rafting trip? Remember when you and your class camped out in the woods during your trip? Remember when Mr. Tuttle asked you to go get some sticks for a fire he was preparing? Remember when you fumbled about int he darkness looking for some wood to burn? Remember when you heard some leaves rustling and thought it was just a squirrel? Remember when you realized it was not a squirrel when Maxwell Nerdstrom's fist came flying out of nowhere, hitting you in the stomach? Remember when you groaned in pain? Remember when the black nerd who always wore highwater pants and glasses gave you a forearm in you Adam's apple? Remember you you fell over, struggling to breathe? Remember when you struggled breathing even more when Mr. Belding emerged from the darkness and lodged his erect penis down your throat? Remember when Nerdstrom tore off your pants and gave you a thorough anal pounding? Remember when the black nerd shit all over your back while this was going on? Remember when they finally let you go and you crawled back to camp by yourself looking as though you were in obvious pain? Remember how enraged Tuttle was when he saw you without any firewood? Remember when he and Mr. Belding dragged you into their tent and double-teamed you for 45 minutes? Remember when they were finally done and Tuttle and Belding took turns sticking pens up your cornhole? You got a good workout on that trip! 19th October 2004 - 01:12:13 AM 10432 : Ox Screech, remember that episode where Mr. Belding was the substitute gym teacher when the regular gym teacher was sick? Remember when the class played dodgeball that day? Remember when you and your class used 4 red dodgeballs during the game? Remember when Mr. Belding was the ref? Remember how Mr. Belding was much bigger than you and much stronger? Remember when 3 minutes into the game, Mr. Belding whipped a dodgeball as hard as he could right at the back of your head from 20 feet away? Remember when you turned around and started crying? Remember when Mr. Belding whipped another dodgeball right in your groin? Remember when you doubled over in pain? Remember when Slater then fired one of the dodgeballs at your stomach as you laid on the gym floor? Remember when Zack kicked you in the neck and then sat on your face and farted? Remember when Slater tied you to the rop hanging from the ceiling? Remember Mr. Belding brought out a tennis ball machine, set it on full power, and started firing tennis balls as your crotch? Remember the intense pain you felt as you were getting pelted with tennis balls? Remember when Slater tore off your gym shorts and underwear and felt an even more intense pain as Slater pounded away at you until he unleashed his load in your brownpipe? Remember when Mr. Belding and Zack did the same thing to you? Remember when your colon was so damaged from the encounter that you had to wear a colostomy bag for the rest of your life? Zack, Slater and Zack really got you that time! 17th October 2004 - 09:56:54 PM 10419 : Ox Screech, remember when Zack and you plotted to win the "Miss Bayside" beauty contest? Remember when Zack painted our eyes black and you told everyone that Slater beat you up? Remember when everyone felt soory for you, so they voted you "Miss Bayside"? Remember when Slater found out that you cheated to win and said "I'm gonna give you faggot!" Remember when Slater tackled you inside the lockerroom after the contest? Remember when he punched you in the face, and flung you into a row of lockers? Remember when you started crying? Remember when you saw Mr. Belding and ran to the safety of his arms? Remember when he grabbed you in a bear hug and you could barely breathe? Remember when Slater yanked down your pants while Belding held you tightly? Remember when Slater started thrusting away at your sphincter with his greasy Mexican woodrow? Remember when he pulled out and blew his load on your back? Remember when you thought that the worst was finally over? Remember when you realized that that the worst was not over when Mr. Belding threw you on the ground, gave you a Cleveland Steamer and a warm pair of Arabian Goggles for hours on end 17th October 2004 - 07:25:07 AM 10413 : jaleel white dustin, remember that recent magazine article where you said that you and i were 2 of the 3 comedic icons of the 1990s? remember how they duped you into thinking it was a real interview and just made fun of you the whole time? remember how that was all you could get? remember when you grew facial stubble and tried to project a false image of yourself to hide from the truth that you're just a washed up child actor who had very little talent in the first place? remember when you had aspirations of doing real acting and not just being typecasted as a complete loser? remember when you started the band "salty the pocket knife" and had producers and session musicians make songs for you so you could hide from your extremely pathetic real quintessence and live vicariously through a new one that you can only manage to fool yourself into believing? 14th October 2004 - 01:27:10 AM 10352 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when you were wating lunch in the cafeteria when I threw an apple at the back of your head from about 15 feet away? Remember when the apple shattered in pieces? Remember when you turned around and started crying? Remember when Slater came running over to you and you hoped he'd scoop you up in his muscular arms and protect you? Remember when instead of protecting you, he broke a tray over your head? Remember when Zack and Slater picked you up and carried you into the gym locker room? Remember how nobody was in there because it was lunchtime? Remember when 20 guys took turns doubling up on you? Remember how you had a cock in your mouth and one in your ass when Mr. Belding walked in? Remember how relieved you were when you saw him? Remember how less relieved you became when he "relieved" himself on you? Remember how he coated your head with his golden shower? Remember when Mr. Tuttle walked into the locker room with plumbing equipment? Remember when Mr. Belding and Mr. Tuttle unscrewed the drain pipe on the urinal trough, and taped it to your mouth? Remember when Mr. Tuttle took a piss in the trough and his urinal swirled down the drain and flowed directly into your mouth? Remember when the wrestling coach brought in the wrsetling team and they all pissed in the trough? Remember how they finally let you go and you had to go get your stomache pumped? Remember when you were scared to drink Mountain Dew for years afterward and had to take intense psychiatric therapy? You really got "hosed" that time! 12th October 2004 - 11:30:55 PM 10323 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when you and Slater slept over at Zack's house? Remember when you saw Zack's huge cordless phone and you started laughing? Remember when Zack and Slater both called you a "faggot" and told you to "shut the fuck up?" Remember when you started crying and ran out of the room looking for the bathroom so that you could wipe away your tears with tissues? Remember when you ran into Zack's dad in the hallway and he told you he had tissues in his bedroom? Remember how surprised you were when you walked into his bedroom and saw Mr. Tuttle sucking off Mr. Belding in Zack's dad's bed? Remember how disturbed you were when you saw Mrs. Morris taking pictures of them? Remember when Zack's dad locked the door behind you and then pushed you onto the bed? Remember when Mr. Tuttle grabbed you by the neck and Mr. Belding pulled down your pants? Remember when when Mr. Tuttle, Mr. Belding, and Zack's dad all took turns butt slamming you all evening in front of Zack's mom's camera? Remember when Mrs. Morris developed the pictures, and everything was cropped out except your body and the penises? Remember when she developed some of the pictures and blew them up to make posters which she then sold to local gay bars? Remember when the police raid the gay bars, found the posters, and then arrested you for distributing child porn? Remember when you when to jail for 3 months and became the bitch of a smelly Puerto Rican named Jose? Remember when you got out on parole and discovered you had AIDS? You sure got screwed over that time! 12th October 2004 - 05:45:50 PM 10317 : Mario Lopez Eyyy, Dusty! Remember when filming on SBTB season 3 ended, and during the wrap party me and Mark-Paul got you totally wasted on cheap champagne, and you told us you really needed a man? Remember how after the party, we hired a rent boy for you and set the two of you up in a sleazy motel? Remember how Mark-Paul and I said it would be totally hot if we could come along and film the two of you? Remember how we borrowed a camera from the studio, and filmed you and the rent boy having intense gay sex for a couple of hours? Remember how we even filmed you snorting coke out of his butt-crack? And then, remember how Mark-Paul and I made copies of the tape and 'accidentally' mailed them to your friends, your immediate family and your colleagues? Remember how shocked and appalled they all were? Remember how the shock killed off a few of your older relatives? Remember the scandal and outrage and suicide attempts? Man, Mark-Paul and I sure got you good that time! Boy was your face red!! Ha ha ha!!!! 11th October 2004 - 10:49:40 PM 10292 : Ox Screech, remember that episode when Slater and Mr. Belding dared you to steal a pack of gum from a 7-11? Remember when you went inside and Slater saw a cop drive up? Remember when Slater told the you were shoplifting? Remmeber when the cop went inside the 7- |