| 22nd November 2006 - 01:00:42 AM |
| 79128 : Jerry Seinfeld |
| Why is it that every time I want Dustin to ejaculate inside me, he pulls out and splurts on the throw pillows? What is up with that? Who ARE these people? They're the pull-out-and-splurt-on-the-throw pillows people! Airplane food! |
| 22nd November 2006 - 01:22:13 AM |
| 79129 : Dane Cook |
| Dustin, as a long-time friend, I am always watching out for you. As you may have heard, considering the amazing buzz around Hollywood, I'm writing and directing a film to be aired on the Sci-Fi Channel. It's called, "Close Encounters of the Third Reich," and I'm looking at YOU to play the villain. I know that you, much like me, are working hard at your acting carreer, and I think it's time you took on a darker role. You'd be playing Dorf Hitler. He's a Nazi Space alien who wants to destroy the moon for some reason. It's a three day filming schedule and I'll pay you in coke. Get back to me soon if you're interested, because Miles O'Keefe is hungry for this part and he gives better hand jobs. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 01:50:28 AM |
| 79130 : Brian Austin Green |
| Dustin, I want to thank you. I want to thank you for being the gentle, sensitive soul that you are. I never thought that I'd meet a man so romantic. But when you lit those scented candles, devoured your own edible panties, and then dressed a baby grand piano with freshly plucked rose pedals, shoved it inside me, and performed a touching rendition of "Islands in the Stream" up my asshole, I knew I had found it... IT! True love. In it's purest form. Stretching the rings of my sphincter in ways I never thought possible. In the way God intended. Thank you, friend. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 04:32:22 AM |
| 79131 : \"Mr Belding\" |
| My pants are down. Suck the Principal's orifice immediately. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 07:04:52 AM |
| 79132 : Vincent Kennedy McMahon |
| PRAISE BE THE NAME OF VINCENT KENNEDY MCMAHON. Screech, Wrestlemania 23™ - Icon vs Icon: "K-Fed" vs "Screech". In a lumberjack prison cage rape match. One WWE superstar will be greased up and ready enter the "prison" every minute, double, triple and even quadruple-teaming you! This will be the match of the decade, the match of the year! And the Wrestlemania that will end all Wrestlemania's! Call my office for further details. Wrestlemania 23™ - where we scrape the bottom of the barrel, again. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 09:14:25 AM |
| 79133 : Deucer |
| Hey Jerry, remember the episode where Kramer burst into your apartment, started calling you a black bastard and then raped you? Remember how he called you a filthy nigger as he lost his load inside your colon? Remember how he took a dump in your jew-fro? Remember how George, Uncle Leo and The Soup Nazi burst in and bukkake'd all over your face? That sure was some classic television, you big-nosed child-fucker! |
| 22nd November 2006 - 09:28:04 AM |
| 79134 : Night Terrors |
| Do you get night terrors of yourself running away from the Screech character dressed up in zubaz screaming "ZOINKS" whenever he catches up to you and tries to hump your leg? Is that why you try to distance yourself from the Screech character and flatly refuse to do the Screech voice or say "zoinks" for fear of pitching your tent uncontrollably? Is it true that you called the "Ghostbusters" to rid yourself of the night terrors? Did they asked who your favorite character was and you replied "slimer" and they suddenly disrobbed and held up their "proton packs" crossed the streams and slimed you with their thick juice? Was it true that you found out that the Ghostbusters were really Zack, Slater and Mr Belding dressed up for Halloween and had been playing a tape with an infinite loop of your screech character yelping "ZOINKS" all the time? Is it true that you are still haunted by the visions of Mr B, Zack and Slater crossing their sperm streams onto your face? Well I got news for you - they're back! *ZOINKS! |
| 22nd November 2006 - 09:57:09 AM |
| 79135 : Kurt Steinberg |
| Deucer, I loved all of the episodes where Uncle Leo had sex with Jerry. Do you remember the episode where Newman took a shit in Jerry's sink and Uncle Leo rubbed it all over his bald head? Kramer held a knife to Jerry's throat and made Jerry lick clean Uncle Leo's head! I shot my load across the room when I saw that scene. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 01:41:49 PM |
| 79136 : |
| screech remember the episode where you grew up to be a pathetic laughing stock and married a tubby bitch you met at arbys named jennifer misner? that was one of the funniest things ive ever seen. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 01:47:13 PM |
| 79137 : |
| screech i would rather be kramer or the star wars kid than you. you are just naturally the biggest piece of shit out there. you pathetic, begging, tubby, hook nosed chubby chaser. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 03:08:02 PM |
| 79138 : Pat Smear |
| Dustin, when I strung you up by your suspenders and you insemenated my colon sans gravity, we conceived a bastard ass baby. Why don't you visit your ass son, Dustin? HE LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU! |
| 22nd November 2006 - 04:35:08 PM |
| 79139 : |
| Screech, stop acting like a fucking bitch. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 04:40:32 PM |
| 79140 : |
| bbc.co.uk Accessibility Links Skip to content Skip to bbc.co.uk navigation Skip to search Access keys help bbc.co.uk Navigation Search Home TV Radio Talk Where I Live A-Z Index UK versionInternational version|About the versions Low graphics|Accessibility help BBC News in video and audio News services Your news when you want it News Front Page World UK England Northern Ireland Scotland Wales Business Politics Health Medical notes Education Science/Nature Technology Entertainment ----------------- Have Your Say Magazine In Pictures Country Profiles Special Reports Programmes RELATED BBC SITES SPORT WEATHER CBBC NEWSROUND ON THIS DAY EDITORS' BLOG Last Updated: Wednesday, 22 November 2006, 12:26 GMT E-mail this to a friend Printable version 'Increasing pool' of UK HIV cases People with HIV are living longer thanks to improved treatments An "increasing pool" of people in the UK are living with HIV and Aids, official statistics show. The Health Protection Agency says around 63,500 UK adults were l§ |
| 22nd November 2006 - 04:44:06 PM |
| 79141 : Wally Wanker |
| Dustin, I blame you for the failure of my candy company. Your idea to introduce a Screech-themed line of candy ruined me! The Zubaz Bars and the Zoinks Zappers and the Colon Confectionaries haven't sold at all. You'll be hearing from my wacky lawyers soon enough. |
| 22nd November 2006 - 04:56:26 PM |
| 79142 : Corey Feldman |
| SHAMONE! |
| 23rd November 2006 - 12:03:39 AM |
| 79143 : Henry Winkler |
| Ayyyyy! How's about I get my motorbike and jump your asshole, Dusty? |
| 23rd November 2006 - 12:10:00 AM |
| 79144 : Soup Nazi |
| SOUP COLONICS FOR YOU! |
| 23rd November 2006 - 01:50:54 AM |
| 79145 : |
| screech, did mr b use 2 take a shit into a jam jar and then smash it over your head? i think it would be pretty hot seeing your jewfro covered in shards of glass and shit! |
| 23rd November 2006 - 05:41:18 AM |
| 79146 : twinkie tightbutt |
| oh god dustin i am so hot 4 u. i am a 19yr old twink, experienced but still super-tight. please meet up wiv me and jam ur mighty jewpole between my lily-white ass cheeks. i will crush yr cock like a vice. |
| 23rd November 2006 - 06:57:57 AM |
| 79147 : Confessions of a Driving Instructor |
| Can I park my car in your garage? |