| 24th November 2004 - 04:15:45 PM |
| 11248 : Ghost of Thanksgiving! |
| Dustin! I would find it very erotic if I could slowly pluck all the hairs off your body, shove fistfuls of bread crumbs up your ass, masturbate into a turkey baster which I will then shove up your ass, smother you with melted butter, but you in my oven at 350 degrees for three hours, and mercilessly fuck the stuffing out of you! Then my queer friends, dressed as Indians and pilgrims, will bust out the Bukkake style and then devour your delicious, man-goo coated flesh. It will be very festive and gay. If you would rather save the fun for Christmas, I'd be happy to stick some presents up your chimney! |
| 24th November 2004 - 04:21:05 PM |
| 11249 : |
| that's one thanksgiving party I'd love to attend |
| 24th November 2004 - 04:30:08 PM |
| 11250 : Skip Gayly |
| Oh, yeah. saltythepocketknife.com is definately starting to get sticky again. |
| 24th November 2004 - 04:42:46 PM |
| 11251 : The Guy From sidewalkvagina.com |
| Hey, Dustin. I was thinking how erotic it would be if you would slowly pop the giant zits on my face. I want to smear you with my pus and smell your taint after you jog two miles naked in front of children. Please allow me to connect a car battery to your nipples, so I can shock you until you involuntarily shit large bursts of hot fecal matter onto my chest. Also, I like to run up on confused elderly people, tape their arms and legs together, sit on their faces, and fart violently. Would you like to join me sometime? |
| 24th November 2004 - 05:19:16 PM |
| 11252 : The Loudest Farter |
| Thanks, queers. I just lost a couple loads reading the saltythepocketknife.com forum. I had no idea dogs knew how to type, but there's even some canine stroke fodder! Down, boy! |
| 24th November 2004 - 05:47:06 PM |
| 11253 : Adolph Hitler |
| Hial! Dustin, you are so sexy zat I no longer hate ze Juden. Yes, I am touching ze asshole as I am typing ziss. Did you know zey made a sex move just for me? I vant to give it to you. It's called "Ze Hitler," but first you vill have to shave ze goatee. I vould love to vatch ze Aryan Zack licking your asshole clean. Let's have orgy viss Zack and ze small retarded boy and maybe a penguin. |
| 24th November 2004 - 05:57:36 PM |
| 11254 : Heinrich Himmler |
| Oooch ja Adolph, Zack is so hot, viz his Aryan good looks and boyish charm. Whenever I am sinking about him, meiner größenbratwurst is standink to attention and saluting mein fuhrer. MEINE LIEBENN!!!!! Excusing me please meiner englase is not verr gut. Ja, for sure I would also like to have ze gay sex mit Dustin, even zo he is ze filzy juden. And also mit ze Slater, even zo he is ze filzy vetback. I do not care! I'm flamink gay!!! |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:06:49 PM |
| 11255 : Dustin! |
| Hey, guys. I just wanted to thank all the fans who made it out to the Laff Barn in Asbestos Mountain, GA last night. You five guys are terriffic. I would have done more jokes, but JP wanted me back at the motel... Had fun last night. JP was up for a rowdy fisting session, after which he dropped flaming sewer rats into my gaping, cavernous asshole one by one. As you may imagine, I had a rough time on the toilet today! Coffee? No thanks! LOL! Anyway, my first comedy album, "Laugh Yourself Queer, And Laugh Some More," should be out on Anal Catastrophe Records by December 16, so be sure to save your lunch money LOL! =) I'm gay! |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:18:39 PM |
| 11256 : Billy-Bob Whitetrash |
| Hey, Dusty! I was one of the 5 guys at your show last night! I gotta say man, you were THE SHIT. I mean I damn near crapped my pants I laughed so hard! Yee-haw! Remember that Robert De Niro impression you did? That shit was genius, man! And remember how you kept saying the F-word? Woo hoo hoo, I was rolling in the aisles! And when you said how Zack and Slater used to get it on after SBTB shoots? I knew them guys was faggots, man! And remember how me and my 4 buddies caught you in the parking lot after the show, took you behind the venue, and ass-raped the living shit out of you, and while I was pounding away at your ass you kept screaming 'OH YES FUCK ME HARDER YOU BIG MOUNTAIN GORILLA'? Well that's just what my 10-year old nephew says! Ha ha haaaa! How's that for coincidence?? |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:19:42 PM |
| 11257 : A Fan From Asbestos Mountain |
| You are forgiven, but I'm really sad I couldn't catch you back stage so you could sign my colon with your penis-marker. Maybe next time. I really liked the joke about Slater's dog eating your asshole and then you get raped by prison guards in Mexico because you were stealing ecstacy. Is that true? |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:30:22 PM |
| 11258 : Urine Enema |
| hello dustin i will never ferget teh saved by the bell as it was what i was watching the first time my uncle roger sodomized me with a submarine sandwich. i can still smell the turkey bacon and avacado and see your member bouncing around in your baggy zubaz it makes me want to put teh rubber fist in my stankhole and rub scolding hot gravy all over my genitals you are so sex! |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:34:31 PM |
| 11259 : The Dust DOING IT FOE THA SHORTIES |
| Hey kids, This is the REAL Dustin Diamond, coming at ya with a very important message. Y'see, there are a lot of disillusioned homosexuals on this guestbook who like to insult me just because I'm a faggot-hating hypocrite. But you shouldn't listen to them, mmkay? They are nasty people who kill kittens and hate Jesus and burn the American flag. You stay away from them. So if there's a scrawny looking, zubaz wearing jewish kid at your school who everyone likes to call names, you be nice to him and become his friend, because he may very well be THE NEXT DUSTIN DIAMOND. Mmmkay? Trust the dust. Oh and don't do drugs. Your friend - Dustin |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:43:04 PM |
| 11260 : Sir Loin |
| Man! You ain't doin' nuthin' 4 tha shorteez! |
| 24th November 2004 - 06:59:00 PM |
| 11261 : The Kid From Jerry MacGuire |
| Did you know that the human anus weighs twelve pounds? At least Dustin's does. He let me weigh it. He stood on my mom's bathroom scale, and I weighed him. Then, I weighed him without his anus. There was a twelve pound difference. Did you know that the average Jewish man ejaculates approx. 6 ounces? I know because I weighed myself, and then Dustin blew a load in me and I weighed myself again. 6 ounce difference. I don't blame Dustin for making me poo on him, or even for biting my genitals. If it's for the advancement of science, it's for the good of mankind. |
| 24th November 2004 - 07:06:59 PM |
| 11262 : Haley Joel-Osment |
| Dustin taught me that apple sauce makes great taint moisturizer. It keeps your taint looking young and healthy, reducing wrinkles and smoothing out rough areas. Anyone concerned about taint beauty should give it a try. Thanks, Dust. I see gay people! |
| 24th November 2004 - 07:30:44 PM |
| 11263 : |
| new posts @ salty teh pocket knurf! =) |
| 24th November 2004 - 07:33:47 PM |
| 11264 : Joey Buttafuoco |
| Eyy Screech, you fuckin maggot-dick. Don't think I've forgotten about you, cos I haven't. I'm still watchin'. I know how to bide my time. I caught your act the other day. You're real fuckin funny, college boy. But I bet you'll look even more fuckin funny when I pull you off the street when you least expect it, and BAM! fit you a pair of Arabian Goggles and drop a nice, greasy Napoli steamer in your mouth. Then we'll see who's fuckin jokin, tough guy. Keep lookin over yer shoulder, slick. |
| 24th November 2004 - 08:05:11 PM |
| 11265 : Amy Fisher |
| Screech you fuckin' quee-ah! If you lay one goddamn finga on my Joey, I'm gonna cut ya fuckin' balls off! I loyned how to do it in population with just a toot-brush. You watch ya fuckin' back... Jagoff! Joey why you don't see me no more? If yous toyned quee-ah, gimme anotha shot. I'll be real good to ya, baby! I promise! |
| 24th November 2004 - 11:23:57 PM |
| 11266 : S!CK B0Y! |
| Hell motherfucking yes! I spent about a collective thirty minutes this evening on saltythepocketknife.com! I hope you all admire my work, but especially Dustin. Don't forget to add your own posts after you lose a couple loads! |
| 25th November 2004 - 01:15:10 AM |
| 11267 : Hitler Party |
| COURAGE Courage is the most beautiful and noble trait a man can have. He who has no courage is not a man. §The "storming courage" of an attack is wonderful. The feeling of having risked all in service of a high ideal frees one and lets him charge forward with joy. Courage bears a man as if he had wings, and fills his heart. §The attack becomes the high point of life. When everything depends on one card, when one can lose everything, when one can win everything, life is at its best. He who has never charged and attacked, filled with courage, has never fully lived. §Alongside "stormy courage" is the "indomitable courage" of those facing hard fate. "Fate is great and powerful, but greater still is the person who bears it unshaken." §Life is often harder than death. A coward holds on to it. No one faces a challenge greater than the strength he has been given to face it. Courage overcomes all. When one has done all in his power, good luck comes to show him a new way and help him along. But it is not really good luck. "Resist all powers, never give in, be strong, calls the army of the gods." §Courage is needed not only by the man, by the soldier, a woman too needs courage. For the man battle, the attack is the greatest challenge. For the woman it comes when she gives a new person life. Men who no longer want to wage war cannot face the mothers who give new life at the risk of their own. §Courage is the noblest trait of a man or woman. It determines the battle and gives victory. |